Annoyance

– Ponderings:

Tori is being a tad annoying this morning. She woke me up early to get attention, so I got up. She went outside but just sat there and stared at me. She came inside and walked over to her food bowl, and when I filled it, she walked away. I’m now awake, and she’s lying on the couch snoring. I want to wake her up and ask her, “Why?” But, of course, she has no answer. Which got me pondering. I wonder if I annoy God. Can we annoy God? Is God annoyable (is that even a word)?

Sometimes I know that I take way too long to figure out God’s will, make excuses for things I’ve done or failed to do, or claim that I don’t know what God wants when I actually do (and don’t want to do it). In my imagination, I can envision God wanting to get my attention, look me in the face, and ask me, “Why?” But then I realize I’m putting my human emotions onto God and overlooking God’s wide view of grace.

“The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.” (Psalm 103:8; NIV).

When I think about it, the root of my question is fear. I fear my repeated prayers, messy doubts, human stubbornness, or ongoing struggles might finally wear down God’s patience. In our human relationships, that’s a reasonable concern. We know what it’s like to be pushed to the edge by repetition, complaints, or neediness. So, we assume God must be like us.

But God is not like us. God is nothing like us.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (Isaiah 55:8-9; NIV).

Psalm 103 assures us that the Lord is slow to anger and abounding in love. That’s not poetic fluff—it’s the truth. God’s patience doesn’t run on a timer. His compassion isn’t portioned out like rations. Annoyance is a human emotion tied to limitation. We get annoyed when we run out of time or energy. But God doesn’t have those limits. God longs for a relationship with us, even a messy, complicated one.

God’s grace reaches out to us, calls us, and stays with us even through our most difficult days. Does that sound like someone who’s annoyed by us? So keep praying. Keep asking. Keep showing up in all your mess with all of your questions. No matter how often you get it wrong, God is patiently waiting for you to get it right.

Prayer: Loving and patient God, thank you for never growing weary of me. When I feel like I’m too much or not enough, remind me of your steadfast love. Help me trust that your heart is open to me, again and again and again, without end. Amen.